After the many conspiracy theories regarding the ethnicity, sexual orientation, religion and other traits of the close to 3,000 victims of 9/11, their lives cut short while performing mundane tasks in their cubicles in either of the twin towers, here comes a new study delving into the psychology of those who after working for years in the same boring jobs, were reduced to ashes in a matter of seconds.
“Imagine how many of them must have been looking bored outside of their cubicle window as the first plane was approaching” said Dr Phil, one of the leaders of the study. “We now have some idea, after interviewing their loved ones, and even the ones they hated and were hated by, that most of them were a sorry bunch.”
“Do you know how many of them had appeared in my show before that fateful day?” continued Dr. Phil with a shrug, “I have not said so, out of respect for the survivors, but you’d be surprised, and so was I.”
According to the survey, many of the surviving office workers started feeling a lot better about their jobs after witnessing the fate of their peers on 9/11. This new level of optimism that rose from the ashes kept many of them going for longer than what they’d otherwise have.
“True there are still some that want to jump off the empire state building instead of carrying on with life in an existential quandary, full of loathing and self doubt, stuck in a meaningless and pitiful existence. Some of them still look out of their window wandering if someone else will put them out of their misery,” added Dr Phil.
“For a moment or two during my day, even I have such thoughts.”